Chapter 32: Relationship Health

AI Can Help Keep Things Going

Ciao and happy Friday!

Hope all of our American friends had a great 4th yesterday.

Chris had us over for a big BBQ (even though it was super hot here) and we all had a great time.

How was your holiday? (If you had one)

VOICE FROM THE PAST

Friends, I'm a little thrown for a loop this week. Remember I was telling you about my ex and how it was kind of a bad breakup?

I hadn't heard from her in 3 years. Not a peep since we signed the divorce papers and disappeared from each others lives.

And I didn't really want to talk to her either! After what I went through to try and keep our relationship going.

You know how in some relationships there is one person who tries to keep things going even though its probably better left done.

Well, that was me.

I could tell things were going wrong. And I tried all sorts of things to keep things going. I would try to buy her thoughtful gifts. I tried to talk to her be available when she need to talk. I tried booking trips and travelling to places I thought she'd like.

I mean, everything was fine. We almost had a storybook life together. But that never happens, right?

We were actually kind of a funny couple. I was the shorter darker Italian guy, and she was this tall blond Finn.

I could still go on forever about our time together but I won't bore you with the details.

I can still feel the pain when I recount some of the bad times.

Anyways, I thought it was all in the past.

I've moved on. Still single but having fun. Everything is great and I'd almost forgotten about her.

You know what happened, right?

She texted me, "Hey"

That's it.

Just "Hey"

What am I supposed to do with that?

That was on Wednesday. I haven't responded yet. I went to Chris' BBQ and now I'm sitting here wrapping up this email thinking. "What do I do now?"

I really don't want to answer her, But I don't know what I should do.

I don't think AI will help me here though. It doesn't know my history with Fiia.

I have to think this through.

RELATIONSHIPS, AMIRITE?

I kinda wish that AI was around when I was with Fiia. I tried a lot of things, but maybe it could have given me more ideas? I mean, remember a few weeks ago when I said that on of the things that really interesting about generative AI is that is not really a machine - it's a sum total of things human beings have written.

The machine is just putting it together in new ways. Maybe one of those new ways could have helped me with Fiia?

I'll never know now.

Enough about me. Let's talk about you.

Let's say that you are in a romantic relationship right now.

And you're realizing that its floundering. Maybe a little. Maybe a lot.

Or maybe it's fine, and you just want it to be better.

AI can help you here.

Maintaining a healthy romantic relationship requires effort, attention, and effective communication.

We are all busy. It's tough to keep the spark alive and ensure both partners feel valued and understood.

Luckily, AI can assist in keeping your romantic relationship healthy by providing personalized advice, reminders, and strategies to strengthen your bond.

Let’s explore how embracing AI can help you maintain a happy and healthy relationship.

I've actually been wanting to cover this topic for a while. Part of being a better human is having better relationships with other humans. And if AI can help to keep those relationships going, all the better.

WHAT?

1. Personalized Communication Tips: AI can analyze communication patterns and offer personalized advice to enhance interactions with your partner.
2. Reminder for Important Dates: AI can remind you of anniversaries, birthdays, and special occasions, ensuring you never miss an important date. This is SUPER IMPORTANT, as I'm terrible with dates. This is where Nik actually helped me a lot as well.
3. Scheduling Quality Time: AI can help you plan regular date nights or quality time together, ensuring consistent and meaningful interaction. Especially, when the AI can get to know you and your partner a bit.
4. Conflict Resolution Strategies: AI can provide techniques and strategies for resolving conflicts and improving understanding between partners.
5. Emotional Check-Ins: AI can prompt regular emotional check-ins to ensure both partners feel heard and understood.

STORY

Let’s talk about Emma and Jake. I know these two from my last company. They often found themselves arguing over small misunderstandings and felt they weren't communicating effectively. They decided to use an AI assistant to help improve their communication. The AI provided personalized communication tips based on their interactions, suggested conversation starters for their date nights, and offered conflict resolution strategies. With these AI-driven insights and prompts, Emma and Jake found it much easier to communicate openly and effectively, leading to a stronger and more understanding relationship.

HOW?

Ready to enhance your relationship with AI’s help? Here’s how to get started:

1. Choose an AI Assistant: Look for AI assistants like Google Assistant, Siri, or Alexa that offer communication and scheduling features.
2. Set Up Personalized Tips: Use the AI to analyze your communication patterns and provide personalized tips to improve your interactions.
3. Enable Reminders: Set up reminders for important dates and regular check-ins or date nights.
4. Use Conversation Starters: Ask the AI for conversation starters based on shared interests or recent activities.
5. Incorporate Conflict Resolution Strategies: Use the AI to learn and implement effective conflict resolution strategies.
6. Schedule Regular Check-Ins: Set up reminders for regular emotional check-ins with your partner.
7. Plan Quality Time: Use the AI to schedule and plan regular date nights or quality time together.

Here’s how a conversation might look between a partner who wants help to improve the relationship and an AI assistant:

You: Hey, I want to improve my relationship with my partner, but I’m not sure if using AI is the best way to do it. Can you help me with that?

AI: Absolutely! I understand your skepticism. Many people feel unsure about using AI for personal matters, but I can offer some unique benefits. For one, I’m available 24/7, which means you can get support and advice whenever you need it. Additionally, I provide unbiased, data-driven insights without judgment. How about we give it a try and see if it helps?

You: Okay, I’m willing to give it a shot. We often have misunderstandings and I feel like we don’t spend enough quality time together.

AI: Those are important areas to address. Let’s start with communication. How about I provide personalized communication tips based on your interactions? For example, if you tend to interrupt each other, I might suggest practicing active listening. Would that be helpful?

You: Yes, that sounds good. But how can you be better than talking to a human advisor?

AI: Great question! While human advisors are valuable, I can offer immediate support and a wealth of data-driven strategies. Plus, I can analyze patterns over time and adapt my advice based on your specific needs. Let’s also incorporate some conversation starters for your date nights. What are some shared interests or recent activities you both enjoy?

You: We both love cooking and watching movies together.

AI: Perfect! Here are some conversation starters:

1. “What’s a new recipe we should try together this week?”
2. “Which movie that we’ve watched together was your favorite and why?”
3. “Is there a new movie or cooking technique you’re excited about?”

You: Those are great. What about conflict resolution?

AI: For conflict resolution, it’s important to stay calm and listen actively. Here are a few strategies:

1. Use “I” Statements: Instead of saying “You always…”, try “I feel…”. This reduces defensiveness.
2. Active Listening: Repeat what your partner says to ensure you understand their perspective.
3. Take Breaks: If things get heated, take a short break to cool down and then resume the conversation.

You: That makes sense. Can you help us with regular emotional check-ins?

AI: Absolutely! Regular check-ins can help you stay connected emotionally. Set up reminders for weekly check-ins where you ask each other how you’re feeling and if there’s anything you need to discuss. This creates a safe space for open communication.

You: Thanks, ChatGPT. But how can I trust your advice?

AI: I understand your concern. My advice is based on analyzing large amounts of data and proven communication techniques. I can also provide consistent reminders and prompts to help you stay on track, which can be harder to get from a human advisor due to scheduling constraints. Let’s also plan some quality time together. How about scheduling a date night this weekend?

You: That sounds perfect. I’ll set up a reminder.

AI: Great! Enjoy your date night, and remember to use the tips we discussed. Let’s check in regularly to see how you’re progressing.

You: Thanks, ChatGPT. I’m excited to improve our relationship, even if I was skeptical at first.

AI: You’re welcome! I’m glad you’re giving it a try. Have a wonderful time, and I’m here if you need any more tips or advice. Let’s work together to make your relationship even stronger.

SUMMARY

So, here's my thinking.

We are just human.

We all have a lot on our plates with work and friends and things that we want to do.

We are all super short on time.

So why not use technology, specifically AI, to help us be better humans to our loved ones?

Will your partner really be annoyed if you remember his or her birthday every year?

If AI helps you pick the perfect gift for the perfect occasion, is that such a big deal?

Remember, AI is not a machine. It's made up of what humans have already said and done.

A machine is not helping you with your relationship with your partner.

Humanity is.

THOUGHTS?

Love to hear from on this or any other chapter so far.

Sorry about talking to you about Fiia, but Chris always tells us to write from our hearts, and that's want was in my heart this week.

Damn. I still don't know what to do.

Guess I'll be using the weekend to figure it out.

See you next week.

Leo Serrano, Editor, Fulfillment Fridays, 10xYOU​

Remember, you can always email me directly at leo@10xyou.us​